Hannah Kreilkamp #10

If Hannah Kricklesmack was a dog, she would be Balto, transporting diphtheria antitoxin with the speed of a diving peregrine falcon on fire.  Karknilamp has a mane that makes 1995 Randy Johnson look like Salacious Crumb, and when she steps onto the field it reflects laser-beam-esque glittered sun-rays into the eye of her defenseless opponents, causing temporary blindness and instant turnovers.  Woah, what is that?!?  Did Athena just give birth to a demon mithril dragon?  No!  That's just Krazykreme getting another layout D.  

Seriously though, Kreilkamp is a sick beast on the field, and you won't know what hit you when you attempt to play against her.  She's got throws for miles, cuts for days, and d's for kilojoules...(thats 1,000 joules!).  She will knock you on your butt 10,000 times, and when you come crawling back for more because your miniscule brain can't possibly process what just happened, she will turn your own moves against you, making you look like a straight up chump.  And then later, at the tournament party, she will dance in circles all over you and your friends, and you will go to bed crying because you know you will never be that awesome. Ever. And if you even try to Whip Your Hair Back and Forth...oh baby, you don't even want to know...